MESS

 

Exciting news today!

Liberating!

Revolutionary!

No, not The State of the Union or The Rebuttal which promise to be, um, campaign speeches. 

And definitely not The State of My Union, which basically is Big dog hates Baby dog- and by association Mommy Dog for bringing Baby dog into the house to be companion to Big Dog.

The news of the day is that researcher Jai Liu of the University of Groningen in the Netherlands has made a thrilling discovery: messy desks lead to clearer, more organized thinking.

Yup. Mess = Clearer, More Organized Thinking.

But wait. It gets better.

The study results suggest that this Mess-effect may not just help the guy or gal who often cannot be located under all that clutter. Mess may impact everybody who happens to simply sit beside the clutter.

The experiment: A bunch of college students were asked to sit at a cluttered cubicle, a tidy cubicle, or one that was somewhere in-between: the Goldilocks approach to psychological testing. The students answered a few questions, and were then given a test where they had to invent an organizing principle for sorting products into groups.

Results? The college kids sitting at the messy desks came up with much simpler organizing principles. They scored high on questions like, “I would like to simplify my life as much as I can.”

 
Liu and her colleagues concluded: “Opposite to conventional wisdom, we found that participants working at a messy desk displayed simpler cognitions. This is because messiness induces a need for simplicity.”

Unbelievable. Messy desk does not lead to distracted mind, after all.  Instead, marvelous Mess sparks a desire for simplicity, ultimately leading desk owner and nearby colleagues to think in a more organized fashion.

It's a revelation! I finally understand my desire to ditch everything and everyone, and run off to a tiny, quiet, peaceful cabin in Jackson Hole. Mess has induced my need for simplicity.

It's mind-blowing! I finally know what to do with the piles of laundry, stacks of mail, shoes, boots, book bags and sports gear cluttering every doorway and floor in my house. Embrace them. Mess is surreptitiously encouraging my kids to be inventors of simpler organizing principles. It will eventually condition them to live simpler lives!

That stack of papers on my desk that I always resented because they were the source of my procrastination?  Henceforth they are my simplicity enablers.

 
Those bowls, mugs, cereal boxes, school books and snacks left on the kitchen table as Husband and offspring dash off to school/work/sports/life?  Henceforth they are my simplicity inspirers.

Twenty years of annoyances between Mars and Venus?  Reevaluated. Mars’ Mess had a purpose, after all.  It was never intended to make me crazy. It was meant to make me a simpleton.

Imagine! Hanging out around Mess leads to clearer, more organized thinking.

Why, it's life-changing! My kids will get great jobs after college, because they will be the clearest, most organized thinkers of their generation.

And I shall have a new vocation. Beginning tomorrow my cluttered tables, desks, floors, counters and closets will be available for rent to any parent, school or organization that wants a child, student or employee to be a clear, organized thinker.

When this news gets out, people will be lining up at my door to come sit beside my Mess. And they will be willing to pay big bucks to do it.

It’s a simple idea, based on an unorganized principle, that will benefit all who have the guts and cash to venture into Mess. 

Just you wait. A year from now, my tax return will be more impressive than Romney's.


QUING Hereby Decrees:  Mess, our stalemate has ended. Victory is yours!