THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

The lover.

The dream.

The child.

The championship.

The job.

The deal.

The friendship.

The dwelling.

The trip.

The passion.

The idea.

The promotion.

The moment.

The decision.

Did he die of complications from lung cancer? Old age? A broken heart?

 
Opinions vary.

Was his broken heart a result of being fired by the university that he had served with distinction for most of his life?

Or was his broken heart a result of accepting that he may have ultimately failed the moral test of his lifetime?

Opinions vary.

Much has and will be made of the life and death of Joe Paterno.

 
He has been lauded as a modest, upright, devoted coach who loved learning more than money; a man who was admired by his players for being “an unbelievable role model”; a scholar who was devoted to “Success with Honor.”

For Paterno, character came first. Championships second.

Just before he died, Paterno was interviewed by Sally Jenkins of the Washington Post. Paterno was asked why, after receiving information in 2002 of the alleged abuse of a child, he decided to report the allegations to his superiors- technically complying with a legal obligation-rather than contacting the police and fulfilling a moral obligation. Paterno answered, “I didn’t know exactly how to handle it and I was afraid to do something that might jeopardize what the university procedure was. So I backed away and turned it over to some other people, people I thought would have a little more expertise than I did. It didn’t work out that way.”

Character first. He backed away.

For Paterno- a father, grandfather, coach- family came first.

 
When questioned why he never followed up on the abuse allegations he had reported to his superiors, Paterno explained that he was hesitant to make follow-up calls because he did not want to be seen as trying to exert any influence for or against Sandusky. "I didn’t know which way to go,” he said. “And rather than get in there and make a mistake . . .” He does not complete his sentence. Paterno's superiors never informed the police about the incident, and Jerry Sandusky allegedly continued to abuse boys for six more years.

Father-figure. He didn't want to exert influence.

For Paterno- an educator and a scholar- on-field success never came at the expense of success in the classroom. 

When asked why he never inquired about the child who was allegedly assaulted by Sandusky, Paterno, a man who spent his career immersed in details, admitted that he never bothered to ask for a single detail about the victim or the crime. When asked about the acts allegedly perpetrated against the child victims, Paterno describes himself as ignorant, unaware, and profoundly confused about the nature of such horrific crimes; crimes he could not comprehend and had 'never heard of.'

Scholar. He was uninterested and unaware. 

Joe Paterno won more football games than any other college coach in history. He is a legend at Penn State and far beyond. Sport's Illustrated columnist Jack McCallum writes, "He was not a perfect man, but he was a man who did more good than bad, someone who made a difference, someone who will be remembered."

Paterno's philosophy was simple. “My thing was play as hard as you can, don’t be stupid, pay attention to details, and have enough guts in the clutch that you’re not afraid to make a play,” he said. “Some things I thought were important for a young man to know.”

Or an elderly man to abide by.

Perhaps Joe Paterno died of a broken heart because he ultimately had to accept that if he had complied with the lessons that he most wanted generations of his young football players to learn, he may have saved children from unspeakable harm- both inside and outside the walls of Penn State. Yet he failed to engage, to pay attention to details, to have enough guts in the clutch so he wasn't afraid to make a play. Or speak up and stop a criminal.

Joe Paterno called the Sandusky scandal "one of the great sorrows of my life. With the benefit of hindsight, I wish I had done more."

Some call it hindsight. Others, regret.

It's The One That Got Away.

The Person. The Moment. The Decision.

That haunts. Young and old. 

We can fool ourselves into believing that The One That Got Away didn’t matter.

But we're haunted by The One That Got Away because it mattered most.

QUING Hereby  Decrees:  Decide. Act. Cherish. Then hindsight will leave you alone.